Leave them behind you if they do not serve you

This week has been about hate for me. "What? But Daniël you can`t hate! You are positive leaf!" And then I answer: "yes I can". The thing is that I actually do not hate, but sometimes it is good for others to hate you, it is fine. Let me tell you the story behind this blabbering.

The story
Two days ago I got a good grade on a test that was really hard. I was really happy and asked the other people in my class how they did (via our group-chat). They all answered that they did not do so well. So I told them I would like to help them, and they became mad at me. They did not believe I wanted to help them.

One of my classmates even said: "Why do you lay it on us so thick?". And I said: I am trying to help you. I wanted them to accept me, but they would not accept it they were still mad. So I felt bad at first, but later it made me realize something.

You do not need to be accepted to help others or be good in general. 
Some of the positive leafs in this world just are not accepted by the world. They are strange, or they work harder than the others (like I probably did, I practiced this subject for 5 hours a week). But they still do not get accepted.

Now it is important to know that you are defined by who are, not who others think you are. In this case I realized that the people in my class were just mad at their selves, they did not try hard enough, otherwise they would have succeeded just like me. If you practice hard enough, if you put enough soul into something you will succeed and leave those negative leaves behind you blabbering. 

How is it going?

Hi guys, what good things are going on in your lives?

How is it going?
I love to open up with these kinds of questions. A lot of times people come up to me and say: "How is it going?". Man, that is the most vague question I have ever heard. What do you mean by "it" and what do you actually want to know are questions that I would to answer with to these questions. These almost angry sounding questions come from the fact that people who ask how is it going often do not even care what you will answer.

What should we ask? 
Well the initial goal of the question how is it going was to start a conversation, you just do not show what you want to know with this question. If you would ask: "what good things are happening in your life?" you would want to make a positive atmosphere or you might just want the other to think about the good things in life. You might also ask: "hey what are your goals in life?" that way you at least have something to talk about instead of: "it is going good!".

The effect
If we would ask more questions that imply real interest we would actually get more interesting answers. People will answer your energy with their version of it. Good energy will lead to good energy and interested energy will lead to interesting answers. So now we might actually get into a more real and honest conversation and we might become real friends as well! Awesome! 

Who am I?

A very beautiful story is the one of the human. It gets born, it is being put on this earth with apparantly the reason to "survive, to make your bloodline survive. Now this human is alive, and the bloodline has a better chance of survival. But the human is the most interesting part believe it or not. As I said before, it is alive. Now what does that mean?

The meaning of life
The answer is we do not know. You might argue that for every living being this reason is different, or you might argue that the reason is one for all beings alive to strive for together. Perhaps it is a mix and perhaps it does not even matter. But I personally like to think it does, I like to think that my life matters, whether it is a purpose for myself, my own soul or a purpose for this whole universe.


Why we think about meaning
There are more people like me who are striving to know their meaning. This is a simple fact that is very interesting, because I do not know someone who has already figured this meaning out. What I do know is why we search for a meaning, it is because we have thought about it before and have not found it. We have thought about what our meaning was and found out that we were only existing.


Don`t we already serve a purpose?
Yes you do, whether you are studying or working you are serving some purpose. If you go to school a lot of times you are making yourself grow with more knowledge. And if you work you are gaining wealth for you and your boss or helping him achieve his goals at least. But is this really what you want to do?


The most important question
 The questions this post waters down to are these: Who am I, what do I want to achieve and how do I want to do that (which should be the last one). If you know these things you will be able to work on yourself, and if you put the answers in a word document you will make it easy for yourself to put your daily activities in perspective with who you want to be. These two things should always be in line.

For me
I will take myself as an example. I am a support, the second man. I want to be someone who protects and empowers others on their quests if their quests help to improve this world. I want to be loving and caring on my own quest and want to have made this world a better place.

Your workpile is overloading? I have the solution

This feeling.. When you just feel like you have to do something. And that is often the truth. There is almost always something you need to do or not do. And this might feel like a huge burden to a lot of people. For we simply can`t even choose what we do a lot of the times. A huge problems lies in your pile of work that might be weighing you down. 

What exactly is the problem?

Is it really a problem that we have to do things? Because a lot of the things we do are for fun. And even if your intention is not for fun there is probably a sliver of fun in every chore or goal in your day. With the right music even cleaning your room might become a party. So why do we still feel stress when there is fun in our piles of work? Well that is simpler than it seems.

When we have things to do, they are in our minds. And this is good because then we do not forget them. But there is also the factor of time. It seems like it is limited because we need to go to sleep, or we need to go to school, or work, or walk our dog at certain times and we even need to visit our grandmothers from time to time. Now this is a bit harder. But if we know where the key lies we only have to pick it up, put in in the door, twist it and push it open. (Which is actually a lot, but can be done really fast with practise)

What exactly is the key?

Well with all of the problems a reasonable solution can be to not let it be a problem to yourself. If we were not accepting a fact as a problem it would not be a problem. If we would accept our chores and whatever we need to do as fun we would have fun instead of a problem. Sounds simple, but it takes practise.

How do we practise?

Simple, when you do things make them fun. This might feel as another goal on your pile, but it might also feel like a way to improve our lives. See? We are already training ourselves. Now let`s say that for today I have 10 hours of school, some work on a project, I want to study and work on my personal goals. This seems like 0 hours of free time (and 8 hours of sleep to stay healthy). But it is actually not a problem to me (yes I was talking about my day sorry). Now as long as I can stay on my goals for today (for example: learning) I have fulfilment. And I can choose how much happiness I can put in my day myself. It is a choice, I can dance while learning for all I know and it would make it fun.

The problem of your pile being on your mind

This problem can be solved by having your goals on a paper. (TIP: have this paper at hand, I have had my goals on my pc for years and have not looked at it. But when I started having it as my lockscreen I saw it at least 12 times a day). Now, if you have your goals for the day on paper (including having fun and improving yourself) you just have to make sure that every activity is on your path to fulfil your goal. And remember to practise having fun while doing it.

I would love to hear your stories.

the story of the 4 droplets

This morning there were 4 drops of water on the wall of my shower. They were neatly arranged in line and really close to each other. I wondered why they wouldn`t touch each other and become one, for then they would be bigger and stronger together and would probably have a more happy “life”. So I thought of a way to get them together. 

At first I just blew at the droplets to try and get them together, it wouldn`t help, they stayed in their line, it seemed to me like they did not know any better. So I started to sprinkle water on the droplets, perhaps this would help, but when I looked again they were still in line. I became frustrated and sprinkled the best I could, and when I looked they were a bit less in line. 

This experience made me feel like god (or whatever looks over us if there is something at all that does that). It must be really frustrating to see people every day being near to each other but not working together. I have felt this before with people (and I`m not even god), there are just so many people around us with the same goals. But they never meet. Let`s all start meeting more, let`s start talking about our goals more (instead of how`s it going, ask: “hey what are your current goals”).  

My mission statement

As a young creator I have been thinking about what it is I want to create in this world. The hard thing about this is that there are no rules if you are forced to create something. You basically have infinite choices. If we were creating a painting, we really could do anything we want we are now only limited by our materials we work with (like your brush and paint). If we would be creating a product however you need to find something within your budget and the product needs people that want to buy it. Here lies a big problem because there are so many possibilities to spend our money on. 

The current status

If we look into our world we see a lot of people that struggle to pay their bills, those people do not buy a lot of products. But they are not the only one, there are also the people that are spending all of their money on having fun or are saving their money. The conclusion? There is not a lot of free money.

How do we sell stuff?

Don`t take me wrong, I am not a salesperson. I actually hate this question, if you have to force people to buy your product it is probably not worth much. Now that is interesting, if we would have something useful that would mean we did not have to sell it right? Wrong! We still need to open the eyes of our lovely future customers. But if we would sell something to improve their lives at least we are on their side, not on the other (like candy factories).

My goal

I want to sell products that improve people’s life. I want to decrease the market share of useless products (candy, casino`s, alcohol etc.) and I want to increase the market share of life improving products (nuts, berry`s, meditation, love). This way I am on your side instead of on the other because I want to give you the chance of improving your life. That is my own mission statement.